The Tearjerker

I received this letter today from a woman I've never met before yet have a great deal in common with. She is also an angel mother. Working in a male dominated industry I don't usually give in to tears at the work place but this letter did me in. At least there's a ladies washroom that I was able to lock myself in for a few minutes! In honour of my daughter...

Dear Mom and Dad,

I wish that I could have said goodbye. It sometimes seems unfair that I was never able to say hello.

I'm OK now; everything is better. I miss you and always will, but I believe we will be together again in time - for all time. Please remember me, use my name, tell my family and your friends about me. Never forget me or pretend I didn't exist.

Thanks for all you did for me. Mom, thanks for putting up with all of the changes in your body; thanks for everything you shared with me. Thanks for talking to me; I know your hopes and dreams for me. Thanks for the songs you sang, and for those gentle pats you gave me while I was floating inside you. You may not realize it, but the rhythmic motion helped me rest peacefully and reassured me. As I grew I could feel your heart beating better and better, and it gave me such a wonderful sense of comfort.

Thanks for the tears you shed for me. I know you did everything you could for me and I am fortunate to have you for my Mother. I am sorry for the sadness and sorrow you have suffered.

Dad, thanks for being there for Mom and me, it must have been so hard for you, trying to be so strong and brave for Mom, when you were confused, upset and afraid yourself. I will miss growing up with you, wrestling, being tossed in the air, just sitting on your lap and learning how to use the TV remote. Please don't ever forget about me. I will never forget about you.

If there is something that I have learned, is that you will not find the answer to the 'why' of all of this, not now anyway. You will live, love and laugh again. Sometimes that can seem very difficult when you hurt and so badly want answers.

I want you to live today; be happy. Bring laughter back into the house. Dare to dream again. You know so much better than others that life is often so short and unpredictable. Tomorrow is never guaranteed.

I would rather this be all a very bad nightmare, but I can do nothing to change that now. However, you can make something good out of my death. Use it as an opportunity to love each other a little bit more and reach out. There are so many hurting people out there who need a hand, a hug, a 'hello,' or just someone to listen. Don't be afraid to admit that you may be one of them. Be gentle with each other.

On a clear, still night, look for me out there in the peace and quiet. Look up, not by the Big Dipper or the Milky Way, but over there in the corner of the sky. See that small, twinkling star you never noticed before?

One more thing before I go, thanks a lot for everything you did for me. Thanks for caring and sharing. Thanks for trying and crying. I love you lots.

Love Kaycie